I tried it on, the identity of a Feminist. In March 2019, during a Possibility Laboratory, I said it out loud for the first time, with some rebellious anger in my voice: “Yes, I am a Feminist” (adding, unspoken: And I don’t care what you think about that).
I was lucky to be in the presence of a conscious spaceholder* who said: “If I were you, I would reconsider that. Being a Feminist limits your Possibilities. Then you get to be only that. I would recommend you try on the identity of a Possibilitator.”
I stepped out of the identity of a Feminist immediately. I am a Possibilitator, and I am a Creatress.
Feminists are often associated with being against men, against Patriarchy. They stand up for Women’s rights, for Women’s equality. I am grateful for all the Feminists that paved the way for something else to become possible, and yet, I am not interested in being a Feminist.
Being a Feminist is still referenced in the Patriarchal game. A Feminist has to fight for Women, often against Men, against Patriarchy. It is a limited perspective and it exists in reference to Patriarchy, putting all the attention there. I am clear I don’t want my attention there, because I need it for something else.
That brings me to the next point: I am not against Patriarchy, and I am not interested in smashing it.
That doesn’t mean I like Patriarchy or want to live in it. I am here to build and inhabit a new gameworld, next culture, that makes Patriarchy obsolete. In fact, I largely live in next culture already. I create that. It is my culture.
That is alivening and refreshing for my system because all the energy that I would invest in fighting Patriarchy, and being a Feminist, I have available to create the world that I want to live in.
The world I want to live in is a world of initiated authentic adults creatively collaborating with each other. It means that they are willing to feel what’s alive in them, that they are willing to heal their emotions, that they are willing to own their shadows and name their unconscious, irresponsible behaviours. It means that they are willing to unfold into their brilliant, vast and unpredictable Beingness. It means to live with each other as sacred human Beings full of unreasonable wisdom from resources within and without. It means to be ecstatic about life, in all shapes and forms.
In order to get there, there is a lot to heal and transform. It involves breaking out of Patriarchy within yourself, just like breaking out of a prison that you created for yourself. It involves coming against walls of old thoughtware and behaviour patterns that you may not even be able to identify as such because they seem so real and true to you. That is why it involves radical teamwork.
The fact that you grew up in Patriarchy and that I grew up in Patriarchy and that hence Patriarchy is in us, ready to be transformed, is the only relevance that Patriarchy has for me.
My anger, sadness and fear about Patriarchy and the results it has created are the fuel for my commitment to build out something different.
I am not interested in being a Feminist or smashing Patriarchy. I am here to create next culture, Archiarchy, which necessarily is regenerative.
For that purpose, I am collaborating with a team of women to build out a Gameworld called “Radically Alive Women”, https://www.radicallyalivewomen.com. Radically Alive Women Edgecast is a big part of that, as is our yearly Women’s Immersion and other offerings.
* Gratitude to Clinton Callahan, who not only holds space for the most transformative trainings you can imagine, but also is the author of books that will blow some of your outdated patriarchal thoughtware right off you. Check them out on thoughtwarepress.mystrikingly.com.