This stuff is deeply engrained in me. So deep that I can’t undo it alone.
There is this belief that women are emotional, connected to their feelings, whereas men are rational, mind focused.
It’s not quite true.
In a way we are all emotional, in that we have a lot of unprocessed, unexpressed feelings from the past (emotions) that burst out or leak out sideways when triggered. Women haven’t learned to feel consciously just as much as men haven’t learned how to feel consciously. And in a way we are all mind-focused, because the only way we learned to be is rational. I hadn’t learned how to feel consciously, and how my feelings could serve me to navigate my life and create the kind of life that I couldn’t even imagine I could create. What is more: how to use my feelings as a resource to truly make a difference in this world, by creating a more sustainable culture. Instead, I learned how to figure things out with my head.
My heart longs for a different culture, and when I check the reality of where I am at with that, I feel sad. I am not always living in that culture. What’s in the way? Mostly the deeply engrained stuff. Thousands of generations. Ten thousands of years. It has trickled into subtle survival strategies that we all apply on a daily basis.
The time now is the second best to change that. It’s the only time to change that: Now.
I dream of a culture in which radical honesty is a virtue. Where men and women step out of competition and truly empower each other. Where looking good is irrelevant, because learning and evolving is the bigger goal. Where failures are celebrated. I long for connection beyond the superficial. Deep, meaningful connection. I wish for wild offers outside my comfort zone that bring my Being alive. I want to know who you are, not what or how you do. I want to smell you, not the clouds of artificial perfume that hide your true essence. My Being thrives on clarity, on courage, on possibility. Connection, with each other and the Earth, is what nourishes me deeply. I want to laugh with you, cry with you, scream in rage with you and also in fear. So that the tubes are cleared from these many, many years of clogging up. So that I can hear your clear Yes. Your clear No. Your clear requests. So that authentic adulthood connection becomes possible. So that being nice is no longer a thing because love runs much deeper than that.
I am blessed to have much of that in my life, with men and women. And I want more. I want to lose my mind, so that it can do its job properly, as a tool and assistant rather than as the main driver. I want you to lose your mind in that way too. So that I can see you, behind your mask. Feel you. Hear you. Connect with you. Sustainability includes us human beings.
I want the whole world to live like that because when we do, we start hearing the planet, too. And all the other living Beings. The heartbeat that connects us all.
This stuff is also deeply engrained in us all. Let us uncover it and transform the top layer into fertile compost for Beings to thrive.